Monday, May 2, 2011


I get a secret thrill whenever someone thinks I'm a vapid, gossipy Valley Girl.

It's not the most flattering description, but it nevertheless evokes the same sense of wonder in me as when someone mistakes me for a glamorous fashion model. Or considers me a vivacious optimist. Or expresses admiration for my outgoing, bubbly personality, sure that I am beloved everywhere.

I'm always amazed that these people are talking about the way they see me. Me.

I try to hide the surprise and muse to myself, "So this is what it feels like." To be someone else, I sometimes add, even though it's not true.

This is how I remember myself:

She's a gangly tomboy with glasses, braces, and zits — the triumvirate of dorkiness — and dressed awkwardly in jeans and a worn hoodie. The tall one, not the beautiful one. The smart one, not the popular one. Serious and quiet, she'd rather escape into a novel than suffer the inane conversations of those girls as they chatter about clothes or music or parties. Her parents worry she's antisocial; she rarely bothers to ingratiate herself to others, preferring the solitude of her own thoughts.

Sometimes I forget that she has changed, that she’s no longer limited by the stereotype she'd pigeonholed herself into.

And that's why I love being confronted with any view of myself, complimentary or not, that challenges the one I've held for so long.

It reminds me that the-girl-I-was can, and did, stretch herself beyond what she'd once thought possible.

And so, I let myself dream — of how she will continue to expand her repertoire, wider and wider, until it encompasses everything she's ever wanted to be.

with love,


  1. I am so happy that you came out of the cocoon that you or others made, so just dream, fly and soar like an eagle since there is no ceiling in the sky.

  2. AWW LINDA! i love this. and i like to think that maybe i understand this on a deeper level, having seen your many different sides and people's perceptions of you. my friend asked me if you were a tomboy yesterday and i didn't know how to reply... haha. i think i answered something along the lines of, "hm i'm not sure. what exactly is a tomboy?""

  3. thanks! yeah, i love that we can see the many different aspects to each other's personalities and how we've changed over the years. :)
    (other people's perceptions are so interesting too :P)
    and that's a brilliant response to the question, by the way. haha.
    love you! <3

  4. This post is so....poetic hahaha. Anyways be safe in Taiwan! I'm glad you're trying new things and enjoying yourself! I still remember you from Freshman year in college haha.....seems like not so long ago..... time flies

  5. haha thanks? yeah i'm enjoying taiwan LOTS :D haha i know. i've changed a
    lot since then, i think. time really goes by soooo quickly. hope things are
    going well for you too :)